Throughout my life until the present day I have had experiences that I could not explain. I was born in Africa in 1961 and I first became aware of the experiences as a young child. Among many others, these include:
As a child in the mid 1960's, I saw a short non-human person in my bedroom during the night.
As an adolescent in the late 1970's, I awoke during the night to find a tall thin person standing next to my bed wearing a robe and hood. The person communicated with me telepathically and gave me a metal key. I found the key on my pillow when I woke in the morning.
In my thirties in the mid 1990's, while with a friend driving across country, we inexplicably found ourselves on a different road to the highway on which we had been. Then, my friend suddenly turned off the highway and drove up a hill without either of us having any idea why. When we eventually arrived at our destination, we were six hours late and, in spite of the unexplained detours, were unable to account for several hours of missing time.
Most of my memories of my anomalous experiences are fragmentary and I am aware that there is much that I do not understand about them. Nevertheless, the experiences have had a major impact on my life. In part, this is because of my inability to have complete recall of them, and also because I have had no framework within which to understand, process and assimilate them.
For about ten years between 1992 and 2002 I saw a therapist, Justin Armstrong (pseudonym), who helped me work through some of the personal issues that arose because of having these experiences. Mr. Armstrong considers me to be psychologically normal and not delusional or suffering from mental illness (see Therapy Assessment.) My current therapist, likewise, considers me to be psychologically normal.
In the late 1990's I read a magazine article which listed indicators of possible "alien abduction". At that point, I suddenly realized that, whatever the actual cause, my experiences fit that pattern. I wondered if they might be related to the "alien abduction" phenomenon. At the time, however, I could not cope with the possible implications and I tried not to think too deeply about it.
In early 2001 I reached a crisis point where I realized that I had to face the experiences directly and deal with them, or I would never gain control over their effects on me and my life. I read a book about the "alien abduction" phenomenon: 'Witnessed', by "alien abduction" researcher, Budd Hopkins. It included a letter that a woman had written to Mr. Hopkins in which she told him about a vision she had of a shrouded or hooded person next to her bed. I was amazed because that is what I remember and I had never heard of anyone else having an experience like that. I was even more astonished to read that memories of a hooded figure are a common component of the "alien abduction" phenomenon. I realized that I needed to look seriously at the "alien abduction" pattern of experience, whatever the actual cause, in order to understand my own experiences. I also decided to explore the possibility that "alien abduction" was the origin of my experiences.
In 2001, at Mr. Armstrong's suggestion, I began to write a chronological history of my anomalous experiences and keep a record of my current experiences as they happened. I interviewed people who witnessed parts of some of the events and tried to find as much corroborating evidence as possible.
I decided to suspend my judgment, and record every event that was consistent with any of the theories I knew about that attempted to explain the cause of these types of anomalous experiences, whether I personally thought that the event or the theory were relevant or not. In addition, I decided to record every event that was unusual or incongruent in any way, whether I personally thought it was anomalous or not. This was to bypass as much as possible my preconceptions as to what was relevant and what could be causing the experiences, which might otherwise influence my decisions about which events to record. In addition, I hoped to avoid some of the problems inherent with perception and memory. This enabled me to see patterns in the data that I had been unaware of.
In early 2001 I wrote to Budd Hopkins, and I spoke to him on the telephone the following year. Mr. Armstrong contacted "alien abduction" researcher, Dr. David Jacobs, on my behalf in mid 2002, and I made contact with him myself soon afterwards. Both Mr. Hopkins and Dr. Jacobs provided Mr. Armstrong and me with information about the "alien abduction" phenomenon.
Mr. Armstrong retired as a psychological therapist at the end of 2002, but because he was interested in my longitudinal study, he continued to assist me with it and provide me with valuable feedback, help, and support until late 2006. He said that he did not understand what was happening to me, but that it was obvious to him that something unusual was going on that warranted investigation. So, I continued with my personal research.
By 2003 I had decided to make a detailed record of my experiences so that I could gain a deeper understanding of them and of their effects on my life. I discussed the best ways of doing this with Mr. Armstrong and Dr. Jacobs. As a result, I kept a detailed daily record of my anomalous experiences for one year during 2004. Dr. Jacobs suggested that I take note of my dreams, as he considered that they could be memories of "alien abduction" events. I have an open mind about whether this is the case or not. Therefore, during that period I also recorded all of my remembered dreams. In addition, I collected physiological data relevant to some of the theories about the "alien abduction" phenomenon to correlate with my experiences.
Between December 2004 and February 2007, Dr. Jacobs conducted ninety-one hypnotic regressions, during thirty-seven hypnosis sessions, with me. The sessions were on average about five hours long. He told me that I am one of three research subjects with whom he has done the most extensive amount of hypnosis.
Later, in mid-late 2009, an analysis of the recordings of all of the hypnotic regressions that Dr. Jacobs conducted with me showed that he engaged in extensive leading and suggestion, which I was not fully aware of at the time. It is probable that many of my hypnotically retrieved memories were confabulated as a result of this (see My Hypnosis Sessions with Dr. David Jacobs - Background Information.)
At the same time, I was able to confirm that some of the everyday events that I recalled under hypnosis, such as the date that an event occurred, which I had forgotten, were, in fact, accurate. Therefore I know that hypnosis assisted me in recalling at least some accurate memories. In addition, when I first read Dr. Jacobs' book, 'Secret Life', about the anomalous experiences of "alien abductees", prior to contacting Dr. Jacobs, I was struck by how similar they were to my experiences. These factors appear to mitigate against all of my hypnotically retrieved memories of my anomalous experiences being the result of suggestion, whatever their actual origin.
Dr. Jacobs told me that the "alien abduction" phenomenon is usually intergenerational. When speaking to my relatives about my situation, I was amazed to discover that some of them, including my father, had also had a lifetime of anomalous experiences of which I was unaware, and that my father had seriously considered the "alien abduction" phenomenon as the cause. Others said that they had never had any anomalous experiences themselves. Some were open to the idea of "alien abduction" being the cause and others were skeptical.
During the years that I worked with Dr. Jacobs between 2002 through 2005, he seemed to me to be professional in his approach. I understood that he was doing scholarly research under the auspices of Temple University in America. Consequently I put a great deal of trust in him and I disclosed intimate details about myself and my life as part of my work with him.
I told Dr. Jacobs that if he was ever in the area where I live, that I would introduce him to people who had witnessed aspects of my anomalous experiences. I provided him with audiotapes of my relatives and friends corroborating some of them. Mr. Armstrong signed statements confirming that he had witnessed unexplained marks on my body, as well as other events, and I gave Dr. Jacobs signed copies of them. Mr. Armstrong also had a number of telephone conversations with Dr. Jacobs. During much of 2004 I recorded myself with a video camera while sleeping. In addition, I put the video camera in my window for several weeks. Aspects of a number of strange occurrences were caught on the video recordings, and I gave Dr. Jacobs copies of the video clips.
Dr. Jacobs told me that he thought that my record of my anomalous experiences would make a good contribution to the field of "alien abduction" research. In late 2005 / early 2006, he suggested that I publish it anonymously on his website. He told me that his webmaster, Elizabeth Smith (pseudonym), who was also his research subject, who would put my work on his website, was completely trustworthy and that she would guarantee my anonymity. (Elizabeth also uses, amongst others, the pseudonyms "Becky", and possibly, "Karen".)
Once Elizabeth became involved in my work, however, I was pulled into a bizarre situation regarding her own experiences. Dr. Jacobs began receiving communications from her computer via email and AOL Instant Messenger which she told him were from alien-human "hybrids". These communications referred to me and to my record of my anomalous experiences on a number of occasions. I came to the opinion that this was a hoax, and that Elizabeth was writing the communications. Dr. Jacobs, however, said that he believed that they were authentic. In hindsight, I am of the opinion that he was, in fact, engaged in an abusive psychological "game" with her, that he subsequently involved me in.
Dr. Jacobs' behavior towards me during this period became increasingly peculiar. At one point he implanted hypnotic suggestions in my mind that I had Multiple Personality Disorder, ostensibly so that hostile "aliens" would not know that he was researching my case (see Dr. David Jacobs' Hypnotic Suggestions
of Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD).)
The effects of Dr. Jacobs' behavior on me were compounded by the vulnerable position that I was in as his research subject being regularly hypnotized by him, and eventually caused me severe stress.
I have a sleep disorder, in which I do things in my sleep, which sometimes occurs when I am under stress (see My Sleep Disorder.) In late 2006, the strain of the events triggered my sleep behavior, which exacerbated the situation.
I finally made the decision to end my work with Dr. Jacobs in early 2007. A full account of what occurred will be available in the future. In the meantime, I have provided some preliminary information in Dr. David Jacobs' Account of a "Hybrid" Warning - Audio Clip and Conversations with Dr. David Jacobs - Audio Clips.
Although I have come to believe that my anomalous experiences fit patterns of experience that, in our culture, are often explained as "alien abduction", I have not, at this time, formed an opinion about what is behind them, other than that I believe that it is something real and anomalous. I know that at least some of my experiences are not psychological in origin as there are other witnesses, material artifacts and physical traces associated with them (although there may also be psychological aspects to some of them.) Whatever their origin, my longitudinal study has deepened my understanding of my own experiences. I hope that it can also assist others in exploring this mystifying phenomenon.